Dreaming of Tomorrow Read online

  This time Emily’s father was awake watching television. “Hi dear. How was your day? Did you have fun at the horse show?” He grinned. “You sure look pretty in that dress.”

  She went over to kiss his cheek. “Yes Dad, I had fun at the show. How are you?” She noticed the slight pallor in his face.

  “I’ve been better,” he admitted. “I’m having a little pain today.”

  Emily knew from experience that meant he was having a lot of pain. Although her dad seemed almost like his old self, he had lost almost fifty pounds in recent months. He slept almost all the time now, his hair was gone, and his color was awful. Emily and her father both knew that if he went into the hospital again, he would never come out. They both ignored it.

  “I made a date but I’ll stay home with you, tonight,” Emily offered softly.

  “No! You go out and have a good time,” her dad said firmly. “Who’s your date with?”

  “A man I met at the horse show today,” Emily told him, adding, “he’s a friend of Laura’s. Are you sure you’ll be okay if I go?”

  “I’ll be fine. Now go on and enjoy yourself, you need it. Laura and Jack will stay here. I’ll be all right.” Her father paused. “I don’t want you to shut yourself up in this house for your mother and me. That would just make me feel like more of a burden on you.”

  “Daddy! You two could never be a burden on me,” she protested.

  “Of course we are. I’m not stupid. It’s a fact of life and it can’t be helped.” Her dad smiled sadly. “But tonight you can go out and have a great evening. You need some enjoyment now and then, it’s very important to me. Okay?”

  “Okay Dad.” She kissed his cheek. “I love you.”

  “I love you too, Sweetheart.” Her father smiled up at her. “And I want you to have the best of everything life has to offer. So go on, get out of here and have some fun.”

  Emily was filled with a mixture of conflicting emotions while she waited for David to arrive. She was nervous and still a little ashamed of herself for the way she had spoken to him. She was happy to be going out with him and yet she felt unworthy, as if he should be going out with someone who was better looking and more confident, more. . . More something than she was. She also felt vaguely guilty for leaving her parents again after being out all day. Even her house was a source of some concern for her. It was a comfortable house but it needed care: the lawn was a mess, the porch steps needed repair and the house itself needed paint. The interior was almost as bad: the carpet was clean but old and the furniture was getting worn, almost shabby.

  Three years before, when they planned to replace some old furniture, her father’s illness had been diagnosed. Ever since, Emily and her parents had saved money as much as possible in order to pay medical costs and just in case a private nurse was ever needed full time.

  Soon David arrived, wearing a nice pair of tan slacks and a green and white striped polo shirt. Emily greeted him at the door. She took him into their living room and introduced him to her father.

  “David, I’d like you to meet my father, Pete Ralston. Dad, this is David Silvan.” Emily smiled. “David helped me at the horse show. He told me about the horses and events so it was more interesting. He even fed me lunch.”

  “I’m glad to meet you, Sir.” David shook hands with her father; even to his untrained eyes the older man’s illness was apparent.

  “Likewise. Call me Pete. Can we offer you something to drink?” Emily’s father looked David over and decided he liked this man.

  “No thank you, Pete. Frankly, after spending the day at the horse show, I’m pretty hungry.” David turned to Emily. “But I’d like to meet your mother too, if it’s okay.”

  “I don’t see how you can avoid it.” Emily grinned. “Turn around David, she’s standing right behind you.”

  David turned with a smile on his face and waited while Emily introduced him. “David, this is my mother, Mae Ralston, Mom this is . . .”

  “I know who this is, I’m going out with him aren’t I?” The woman in front of David was tiny, under five feet, with salt and pepper hair and pale blue sparkling eyes.

  “No, Mom. David is my date,” Emily said gently.

  “Damn,” her mother snapped. “Why do you always steal my man?”

  “And why do you always think the best looking men are yours?” Emily muttered, not realizing that David heard until she saw his wide grin.

  “If they’re not, they should be,” Mae said with a grin.

  Laura watched from the window as Emily and David walked to his car. She dug out her cell phone. “Kate, you’ll never guess what happened!”

  She paused before saying, “Emily met someone at the horse how.”

  Another pause. “No, not Frank and Lanie. David Silvan.”

  She held the phone away from her ear as Kate shrieked. “No I’m not kidding, this is perfect!” She put her cell phone away.

  As David held the car door open for Emily, she looked at him and softly said, “David, I’m sorry I avoided you at the end of the horse show.”

  “I wondered about that.” David shut the door. “I was really disappointed.”

  “I was tired, dirty and I felt . . .” She hesitated, then took a deep breath and said, “Aw heck, the truth is I was overwhelmed, I couldn’t believe someone like you could really want to go out with me.”

  “Someone like me?” he asked gently.

  “Yeah, you must realize you’re great looking and nice and well, just everything about you. I couldn’t help but wonder what you could see in me,” she admitted.

  “You don’t think much of me, do you?” he said with some heat.

  “What do you mean?” She was surprised.

  “If you think all I could see in you was your looks, you’re implying that I’m really shallow,” he told her.

  “What more could you see?” she asked.

  “I saw a woman with sadness in her eyes, valiantly trying to do a job she hadn’t counted on even though she was very scared and uncomfortable. A woman who had the courage to be around animals she was afraid of, who ran and caught my horse without thinking of herself. She put others before herself, and did it without complaint and with a sense of humor.” He smiled at her softly. “So put your insecurities away, okay?”

  “Okay.” She grinned.

  “Then let’s go have dinner.” He started the car. “You look very nice, Emily, I like that dress on you.”

  She shot him a rueful smile and said, “Thanks.” She paused for a minute before admitting, “It’s really Laura’s. It’s a maternity dress.”

  “Emily, remember, don’t be down on yourself. Whoever you got the dress from, you look nice in it. Really nice. Trust me.” David seemed just a bit irritated.

  Emily laughed. “All right already. I believe you. I’m looking good. How long have you known Laura?”

  “What?” David thought a moment then said, “Oh, I forgot, the phrase ‘trust me’ is her motto.”

  “It’s how she got me to the horse show,” Emily admitted.

  “It’s how she gets anybody to do anything she wants.” David laughed. “With her, that simple two word phrase is a lethal weapon and she’s not afraid to use it whenever and wherever she wants.”

  “It’s a good thing she only uses her power for good,” Emily said. “I’d hate to think of what she’d do if she tried to rule the world.”

  “Instead she only wants to pair it up, two by two.” David knew of Laura’s matchmaking tendencies.

  Emily was silent for a moment, thinking before she asked, “David, I have to ask. Laura’s such an inveterate matchmaker, did she, um?”

  Her voice trailed off with the question.

  “Not to my knowledge.” He grinned. “Maybe she has great intuition. After all she has a pretty good track record.”

  “No, she has a fantastic track record.” Emily grinned back. “You may be in trouble, Sir.”

  “I’m not complaining.”

  Chapter Six


  It was a fairly short drive to the outskirts of town where David pulled into the parking lot of a local steakhouse. The place had a casual decor and atmosphere, but excellent steaks and seafood. After they parked, they sat in the car for just a moment before getting out.

  “Have you ever been here?” David asked casually.

  “Yes, it’s one of my favorite places,” Emily told him happily, then her mood sobered, “but I haven’t been here for years.”

  “Then I’m really glad I brought you here.” He grinned.

  When David reached for the handle of his door, Emily stopped him. “David wait. Before we go in I want to apologize again for the way I acted today.”

  David looked at her long and hard then said, “Which part are you apologizing for--thinking I’m a hunk,” he grinned, “or thinking I’m too stupid to judge you by who you really are and not just your looks?”

  “I never thought you were stupid!” she protested.

  “So. You’re apologizing for calling me a hunk or even thinking I’m a hunk. Somehow that’s not too comforting,” he teased.

  “No! That’s not what I mean,” Emily protested again without thinking. “How can I apologize for thinking you’re a hunk? If that was a crime all the women in Southern California would be in jail.”

  She noticed the slight flush on David’s face before continuing, “I’m apologizing for letting my insecurities get in between us.”

  “In that case, apology accepted.” David smiled and leaned over to kiss her cheek.

  He never knew how fast Emily’s heart raced, even from that brief contact.

  David got out and walked around the car.

  He opened the door for Emily and waited as she got out. He closed the door behind her and took her arm.

  They walked together into the restaurant. David had not called ahead because he wasn’t sure Emily would go out with him, so they waited in the bar area until they got a table. While they waited, David offered Emily a cocktail.

  “I’ll just take a glass of wine.” Emily smiled.

  “Sounds great. What kind?” He looked at her, realizing, not for the first time, how expressive her eyes were.

  “You decide,” Emily told him. “I don’t drink enough wine to know what’s good or not. I do prefer white wine though.”

  “The house Chablis is pretty good here,” he explained, “and I only want one glass since I’m driving. If you want more, please go ahead.”

  “One glass is all I usually have anyway,” Emily told him. “I’ll have water or a Coke with dinner.”

  They sipped their wine and talked until the hostess came over to tell them their table was ready. They followed her to the table and listened while she explained the specials. She gave them each a menu and left.

  Soon a waiter came over and brought them water. He asked them if they wanted to order a drink, and they each ordered a Coke. He promised to be right back with their Cokes and to take their food order.

  As soon as the waiter returned, carrying two Cokes, they each ordered a steak. She wanted hers rare and he wanted his medium well. The waiter left. Soon he came back with their salads, a basket of warm rolls, and a dish of real butter. Soon after their salads arrived a piece of conversation drifted over from one of the neighboring tables.

  “I wonder what someone so gorgeous is doing with a fat pig like that? Maybe she’s good in bed.” It was a snide female voice, easily heard.

  “Or rich.” One of the other women at the table giggled.

  David’s face tightened and Emily reached out to cover his hand.

  “Ignore them. They’re ignorant fools,” she said softly, but firmly. “And they’re only questioning out loud what some of the others here are probably thinking.”

  “Now you know why I’m out with you,” David said, his agitation making his voice get a little louder, “you’re worth a hundred times more than a . . . a witch like that. Some people are really ugly on the inside.”

  He was rewarded with an audible gasp from the other table.

  When he relaxed a bit, he looked at over at Emily mischievously and said, “I wonder if she was right.”

  “About what?” Emily was puzzled.

  “The part about you being good in bed,” David teased.

  “How would I know? I’ve never. . .” Emily answered without thinking, then she shot him an accusing look. “That wasn’t fair!”

  “Well, if you ever want to find out . . .” he offered with a grin.

  “I’ll be sure keep it in mind,” Emily shot back, her face red.

  “Don’t worry, I’ll remind you.” David’s smile was wide now. “Fairly often.”

  The waiter brought over their meals and they both fell silent for a while, savoring the perfect steaks and stuffed baked potatoes. After a few moments they began to talk to each other.

  Over dinner they had a long conversation. They spent the time really getting to know each other. The light conversation had one bad moment, turning more serious when they discussed why Emily didn’t get out more often.

  “You met my parents. They both need full time care and I can’t afford a private nurse.” Emily paused. “But I do get to go out sometimes, after all, look at today. I spent the whole day out of the house, and now I’m out again this evening.”

  “I know. And I can really understand how tied down you are,” David paused before adding gently adding, “but you’ll be a lot happier if you manage to take some time for yourself.”

  “I won’t have to stay home forever. I’ll have plenty of time for myself when . . .” Her voice trailed off weakly.

  David reached across the table and gently covered her hand. “I know. It’s not easy. And I’m not criticizing you, really. I’m just concerned. What happens if you wake up one day to find yourself all alone?”

  “Then I go out and find a job, call up my friends, and find myself a life.” She grinned ruefully. “Besides, I know Laura and Kate will gang up on me. They have a spotless record as matchmakers. Also, I have lots of plans. Things I’d like to do when the time comes that I can put myself first. I just pray it’s not too soon.”

  Emily shook her head a little sadly then continued, “Do you think it makes me sound like a ghoul? That I’ve planned ahead, even dreamed of things I’ve waited to do, after my parents are gone?”

  “Not at all. I think you need to have those plans and dreams, otherwise you’ll find yourself adrift and that would make the loneliness worse.” He added softly, “But I also think you can’t live your life dreaming of the future. You need to find time for yourself right now. If you keep waiting for tomorrow to come, dreaming of how it could be, you’ll be passing up too many todays. Life’s too short as it is.”

  David paused, taking a sip of his Coke. “Can I ask, what are some of your plans?”

  “I want to go back to school and finish my B. A., then find a job, join some social clubs to meet new people, maybe I’ll even try to workout and get in better shape. Then I’ll get my hair done, buy a new wardrobe and go on from there. Also, I’ve always wanted a dog, but my dad’s allergic to them.”

  “Why don’t you go back to school now?” David asked. “You don’t have to spend that many hours in class, or you can take courses online and, of course, you can study at home.”

  “I can’t afford a computer, and the online courses are still expensive. Plus, even studying online, I’d need to use the nurse once in a while and I can’t afford the nurse that often. It’s all too expensive.” Emily had thought of taking classes and rejected the idea.

  “Well, yes. The courses and computer add up, and I guess a private nurse would be pretty costly but daycare’s not that expensive,” David pointed out.

  “Daycare? But that’s for kids.” Emily was surprised.

  “No. There’s daycare for seniors, too. The senior center on Main has a daycare from 8-4 on weekdays.” David paused before continuing, “At least they used to. It was kind of neat. They do simple exercises, arts and craft
s, sing, and play games. I don’t know what it costs now, but when my dad was still alive it was very reasonable. It’s worth looking into.”

  “You lost your father? I’m sorry.” Emily admitted, “Sometimes I get so wrapped up in my own little world that I forget other people have problems, too.”

  “Dad was a lot older than most of my friends’ fathers. Believe it or not, he was almost fifty when I was born, and close to sixty when Nicole was born. He passed away about three years ago.” David grinned. “I have a lot of good memories of him. We were the last two of his six kids. Our mother was his second wife. She was twenty-two years younger than he was and she could hardly keep up with him.”

  “So how’s your mother doing now?” Emily asked.

  “She’s dating a man about six years younger than she is.” David looked around secretively then said, “Don’t tell anyone I told you this, but I don’t think her new man is half the man my dad was.”

  “Why do you say that?” Emily was curious.

  “She lives in Florida with my older stepsister and my sister tells me that when Mom comes home from her dates, she seems restless, and at the same time almost relieved to be home.”

  “Sounds like most of my dates,” Emily said ruefully. “The ones I can remember.”

  David reached across the table and gently stroked Emily’s hand, giving her a wicked grin. “Well, I’ll do my best to change that, but you have to help.”

  “How?” Emily was puzzled. “What can I do?”

  “You can realize that I’m here with you because I want to be, and leave some of your insecurities behind. You can tell me what you’d like to do.” He kept stroking her hand. “And you can keep smiling at me, just like you are right now. You have the most beautiful smile, it lights up your whole face.”